Someone asked me recently if being married was hard. I may be blissfully ignorant, but I said no. Sure, it has it's challenges, but it is so worth it. Jonathan and I were 22 and 21 when we got married over a year ago. We were (and still are) young, but it was very clear that the LORD was leading us together. We sought him from start and the timing was right. When the LORD leads you to the man or woman He has for you, marriage is a huge blessing not a burden. (God can certainly make a beautiful marriage out of other circumstances as well, but this is my experience.) I couldn't be happier than to wake up next to my man every morning. Often I gaze at his sleeping face and simply thank the LORD for allowing me to be his wife in this life.
That being said, I never want to take this love for granted. I hope I don't ever get used to being married to him. I don't want our love to become lax. I was never promised marriage in this life. When I was younger I wondered if God was calling me to a life of singleness, but He has chosen to give me this blessed mystery. I pray that I never cease to love my man with everything I am.
"We should love hard, and not casually, fervently, playfully and simply, never heavily or slowly. Slovenly loving makes for wearisome living...love like a school girl with giggles and sighs and keep love alive by consciously keeping wonder and surprise at the core of it." ~ Jim Elliot
My husband is playful and for that I am glad. He keeps me laughing and smiling. If you only heard us sometimes! We are so silly! I pray we stay silly as we love hard. My hope is that we both live in wonder of this precious gift we have been given.
The pulse of worship becomes more intense with every line.
Hands raised.
Hearts open.
Over a thousand people sing out an anthem of praise.
We draw near to God.
God draws near to us.
It's so beautiful that would draw near to each one of us. As I sat in the back of the auditorium after worship, I was blown away by this thought: At the same time God was speaking to my heart, He was also speaking to so many others in the room. He speaks to each of us individually. Though hearing the same message and singing the same songs, He sees the hearts of all and has a different plan for everyone. The Spirit is vast. Just thinking about all that He was doing in that room (not to mention the rest of the world) absolutely astounded me. What knowledge! What power! What a great God.
And yet we live as if He is small.
We hear His voice and then forget what He said. We worship Him and live our own lives. We don't remember that the Bible is truly the Word of God. We fail to take the time to come before Him in awe of His majesty. Often you hear people talk about "going deeper" with God. What if we just grasped the simple things? Things like "God is love", and that we were once dead and now made alive in Christ. What if we really learned to pray and worship? What if we learned how to love? I am seeing that I know less about God than I ever have. Just the fact that He speaks to everyone at the same time, on an individual and personal level makes me want to worship. It makes me want to know my God even more.
Hands raised.
Heart open.
My heart singing out an anthem of praise.
When we draw near to God.
God draws near to us. All of us.
For now, I am just coming to Him as a child. I know nothing of His ways and I just want Him to teach me the simple things...for He has more depth than I can even fathom.
WIRED Week 2011 is going really well thus far. I wish you all could be here. The whole place is full of energy! I love being in one place with a generation ready and willing to worship with everything. I am expecting great things!
Well friends, the time has come for my favorite week of the summer. WIRED WEEK!!!! It is a mission's camp similar to Mission-Fuge in our area. My hubby has been the assistant camp director for the past 4 years. Basically, well over 1,000 local youth and volunteers give up a week to come do mission projects and worship together. I'm blown away with how God moves every year.
I love being with the awesome youth.
Watching my husband in action. He is such a good leader.
Jonathan and the Camp Director put so much work into this camp every year. They don't get much sleep for weeks, so sometimes they get a little wacky. Ha!
There are some emergencies sometimes too...like poppy diapers, but it all works out.
Ah WIRED Week! The madness starts this Sunday and lasts until Saturday, so I'll see you guys after we recover from camp.
So there is some exciting news for my family...my brother Matt is engaged! For the past two years, my brother has been traveling with a ministry called Life Action. They travel all over the country hosting revival summits. He plays guitar and sings in the worship band. His girlfriend Kellie joined the team last year. However, they are now home and moving on to the next step in life. They are the sweetest couple. I couldn't be happier about having his new fiance as my future sister! Before I get to the proposal I want to share a bit of their love story.
My brother first noticed this lovely young lady in the youth group. I think Kellie was still in middle school, but don't quote me. Everyone knew that they liked each other, but at the advice of my parents they decided to just be friends. It was still obvious that they had a little bit more than friendship. Still, my brother's heart was set on her so waited and watched. (He started writing songs about her too. They are so sweet!) They both had some growing to do. During this waiting time Kellie became great friends with my sister.
Over the years their friendship grew. After a couple months of college, my brother still wasn't sure where the Lord was directing his life. Then Life Action came our our church and he knew that was what he should do...for the time being. Finally, they made it official just before Matt went off to travel with Life Action. I know that wasn't easy on Kellie. Long distance is never easy! After another year of traveling together, my brother started making plans for the future. He was thinking about moving from Florida to Chicago for school. We all knew there was no way he was going to far without Sure they both are young, but they know and they've always known. They're ready for this kind of commitment.
Now on to the proposal...
Today is my brother's birthday, so he and Kellie went out for a birthday lunch. My family just so happens to be vacationing at the beach, so of course he picked a nice restaurant on the water. After a lovely lunch he took her to a quiet beach. After walking for a while, the beach cleared. There was no one to be seen for miles. Perfect! I don't know the exact words, but Matt said all kinds of sweet things and finally that he was ready to commit his life to Kellie. (Cue the "awe") Then he bent down on one knee...and well, you know the rest!
I couldn't be happier! They are two amazing and godly people and I know they will have a God-honoring marriage!
Let the wedding planning commence!
Fun fact: My brother and I both got engaged on our 21st birthday!
Do you like my new headbands? Well, 1, 2, 3 or more of them can be yours! I am making headbands to raise money for my trip to Ethiopia this fall! Since this mission trip costs $3750 and I have already depleted my savings on the first third, I am having to get creative. They have a very vintage chic feel to them. Who doesn't love vintage these days?
Want one? Yes? Great!
Here are your options:
All proceeds will go to my trip to Ethiopia this fall. (You can read more about it here.) I will be going with International Crisis Aid to work with victims of sex trafficking. We will also be helping the malnourished and several other things. It is going to be quite a trip! Did I mention there are lions in Ethiopia? Ha! This certainly isn't a sight-seeing trip. It'll be more like a feet-aching, heart-wrenching, mind-exhausting, hand-dirtying trip...but it's going to be so worth it. There is nothing better than the knowledge that you are being the hands and feet of Jesus in such a tangible way. Nothing.
I'd be so honored for you to help me get there.
Disclamer: You can donate as much as you'd like (which is why it says donate), but the headbands are a minimum of $20. I will not send a headband for under $20. Thanks!
Today is my sister's 19th birthday! She is truly one of my best friends. There is nothing like the bond we share! I am so glad that I was able to grow up with her, even though she tried to ruin more than one of my sleepovers. She started out as the wild middle child, but has now grown into a beautiful, talented and godly woman! She is a dancer, singer and a wonderful teacher. I can't wait to see what God has in store for her.
One of the saddest moments we ever shared was when I packed up for college. I remember that we sat in front of our closet crying, because we had to split our clothes and shoes. Ha! (We've been the same size in everything since she was 13 or 14. It's so nice!) After I packed up my little old car, she rode with me to school and helped my mom move me in. Our days of sharing a room were over. No more talking late into the night, no more laughing early in the morning as we got dressed, and no more living close. Still, after I moved we became even closer. There is truly nothing like having your sister as a best friend.
I love you sis! I hope you enjoy all the fireworks on your birthday!
I grew up less than 20 minutes from the beach. Let's just say that I didn't know how lucky I was. Sometimes my family would grab a pizza and head out to the beach for the evening...sigh. I miss those days. I love to breathe in the atmosphere of the beach. The sun and sand just ooze with relaxation.
I love...
the sand between my toes...
the texture of the shells...
the sky over the dunes at sunset...
the funny seagulls...
even though they steal your food...
and poop on your head.
I love the palm trees...
going on long bike rides...
the sound of the waves...
and the cute ones you get to be with. :)
Oh the beach! I really am having beach withdrawals this summer. It's already July and we've only been twice! (Still I know that for some of you mid-westerners, twice would be more than you normally get!) I hope I get to take advantage of the beach's beauty while we still live 1 1/2 hours away, because who knows where we'll be in few years! Carpe diem! Seize the day, or in this case the summer!
Sometimes you are lucky enough (or blessed rather) to meet a kindred spirit. It's pretty easy to know if you've ever meet one or not, because you'll realize it right away. I have met several in my lifetime and for that I am thankful. With every passing year, I am realizing more and more that life is rather meaningless apart from relationships. Part of the reason I have found a love for blogging is because of the wonderful friendships I have formed with some amazing people.
This past weekend, Jonathan and I had the pleasure of meeting Arielle and her husband Jay. If you would have told me that this would happen a year ago, I would have laughed. Me, meet people online? No way. It's funny how things change. It has been a huge blessing to meet other godly women who are striving after the Lord in our different walks of life. There may be a great distance between us, but we have a bond in Christ. I can't even count how many times I have been encouraged to press on because of the things I have read, because of the reality of Christ that I've seen in others...in Arielle and others like her.
I was so thrilled to find out that we'd be able to meet up. Jonathan and I seriously had a ball getting to know them better. It knew that we'd be similar, but I didn't know just how similar! Even in the midst of the scorching heat, getting lost and the long wait for food, we managed to have a little fun. :) Surprisingly, there aren't a whole lot of young married couples our age we are (or at least not that we know of), so it was a treat. (Maybe people just aren't getting married in their 20's anymore?) Anyway, it's always a blessing for us to be around people in a similar place in life and walk with the Lord.
Well, you can't meet up with a photographer and blogger with out snapping a few pictures can you? Of course not! Ha! Arielle is a super talented photographer, so she got a few of us. She even had a polaroid camera with her! How cool is that? Here are the 2 she gave to us.
To be honest leaving was kind of sad for us, because we knew that the chances of seeing each other again in the near future isn't very likely. But then again Jonathan and I are willing to go anywhere, so who knows?
They are such a sweet and godly couple and it was an immense privilege to get to meet them!
It has officially been 1 day without any coffee at all.
Honestly, I never thought I'd be able to say "I don't drink coffee". I have loved it since middle school. Despite being extra tired from lack of sleep, I woke up this morning with no desire for coffee whatsoever. No headache. No desire for it at all. (This never happens! Normally I head straight to the kitchen to make a pot.) In my last update, I really felt like I should give up coffee. I don't need to be so dependent on it, especially when I go to Ethiopia this fall. God is proving to me time and time again that He will give me the strength to do what He has called me to do. As silly as it may seem, quiting coffee has helped grow my faith in God...and so has the rest of this project thus far.
These past two months were a whole lot harder than expected. I had to go to Target to get a few wedding presents and had to force myself not to take a peek at all the cute summer clothes. I've had several strong urges to buy some new things, especially before going to weddings. I've also found myself making a mental list of all the things I "need" for my trip to Ethiopia. Yet, time and time again God breaks me, breaks my heart and I remember why He led me to do this. Through this project, my heart's sinful, selfish, and egocentric ways have come to light. At times I pity myself, feel proud of this project and others I am humbled before my Lord in tears, appalled by what is in my heart. Oh, if it were not for grace!
Today I read Psalm 57 in a different perspective. I challenge you to read this from the point of view of a young girl in sex-slavery, forced to be with 30-40 men a day. She cannot escape. Imagine reading this as an 8 year old boy forced to fight and kill in a war that is not his own. He must murder innocent people, or die. Feel the pain of a poor mother who has just had her first child. She is so malnourished that every day is one step closer to death by starvation. But her child, her precious child....is there any hope?
Now read it. How can I now go out and spend money on frivolous things? How can you?
Psalm 57
Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, for in you my soul takes refuge;
in the shadow of your wings I will take refuge, till the storms of destruction pass by. 2I cry out to God Most High, to God whofulfills his purpose for me. 3He will send from heaven and save me; he will put to shame him who tramples me.
God will send out his steadfast love and his faithfulness!
4My soul is in the midst of liona; I lie down amid fiery beasts—
the children of man, whoseteeth are spears and arrows,
whose tongues are sharp swords.
5Be exalted, O God, above the heavens! Let your glory be over all the earth! 6They seta net for my steps; my soul was bowed down.
Theydug a pit in my way, but they have fallen into it themselves. 7My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast! I will sing and make melody! 8Awake, my glory! Awake, O harp and lyre! I will awake the dawn! 9I will give thanks to you, O Lord, among the peoples;
I will sing praises to you among the nations. 10For your steadfast love is great to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds. 11Be exalted, O God, above the heavens! Let your glory be over all the earth!
I'm not saying all this to make you feel bad for drinking coffee or buying things you don't need. I certainly have lots of things that I don't need still. I am just hoping to be a part of a generation that lives for more than American dream, a generation that lives for Christ above all else. My desire is to be the difference to the needy in the name of Jesus and in order to further the gospel.
