Thursday, August 4, 2011

Faith & Fear



I have embarked on a new journey. To be honest, I have absolutely no idea where I'm headed. I know this is the path of the Lord's will but at times I am terrified. The simple fact of the unknown, unplanned and unseen future causes worry to fill my mind.

You see, a little over 2 weeks ago God made it very clear to me that I was supposed to quit my job. I had no doubt that my time there was over. It wasn't the most exciting job ever, but it was comfortable. I had a full time position with benefits and I worked with nice people. Still, I knew I had to leave. I had no plans and nothing else lined up. My husband told me that I needed to follow the Lord's direction, but that didn't make it any less frightening to know that the paycheck was going to end soon.

I knew my Master was telling me, "take this step of faith and I will open the door."

So I did.

Here I am almost 3 weeks later with nothing on the horizon. My heart battles back and forth between fear and faith. The question of what lies ahead is almost maddening at times. Each morning I pray fervently for direction and every day I am comforted by His Word, by His Spirit and told that I need to trust in faith. He knows that I am desperate to follow His will. He knows I will do whatever He asks of me. He knows we can't make it to much longer before the money runs out. He knows my desires. He knows...

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for , the conviction of things not seen." (Hebrews 11:1)


"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make straight your paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6)


Faith - it is all I have to cling to. I have faith that He is good and that He has a plan for our lives. So I wait for the word of direction. I will continue to walk along the path He has laid out for me, though I know not where it leads or what my next step will be. I rest in knowing that He is faithful though I am faithless. He will fulfill His promises. His ways are higher and I trust Him.


So there you have it. Raw and real. 


I am jobless. 




44 comments:

Natalie @ NS Pottery said...

I KNOW that God has amazing things in store for you, and I can't wait to see! Praying for you.

a girl with a smile said...

I'm on the same boat, although a little further on the journey. I didn't know that quitting my job would be because God was moving me to another place until two weeks after I had left. I found that worshiping the Lord was all I could do during the waiting period. There's still a lot of things unknown ahead, but He leads me step by step and I am fine witht he fact that only He sees the big picture.

Luisa Rodríguez said...

God has amazing plans for you. No doubt.

_______________________________
http://mustbeliberating.blogspot.com/

Christina said...

The Lord is faithful to provide. This is a time of dependence on him and nothing else.

Carly said...

You've got amazing things in store, sweet girl! :) Praying for God to reveal those things to you sooner rather than later - and praying for your ability to trust in that (we could all use some of those prayers, couldn't we?!).

-Carly

Sonia said...

There is such a difference in speaking of faith, and truly living it out, and you are most definitely demonstrating the latter. Jennifer, I can't wait to hear of your breakthrough and I'll keep you in prayer!!

hannah singer said...

praise jesus for your willing spirit he gave you!
what a testimony. press on, be encouraged. praying for you!

Psalm 25:4-5 ESV
Make me to know your ways, O Lord;
teach me your paths.
Lead me in your truth and teach me,
for you are the God of my salvation;
for you I wait all the day long.

Elle said...

Keep the faith girl. I am in the same position you were in. I know I need a new job. Great people, stable job, but too comfortable with no growth at all. I just need to find a new job before I can quit this one. Good luck to you girl!

Emily said...

Welcome to the club. ;)

I love those verses in Proverbs. Ones I've been clinging to for the past 8 months. I think it's so neat when we clearly hear Him telling us what to do even when it freaks us out.

It might be a long time from now, but I (and I know you) have no doubt He'll tell you what to do next. Be still and know that He is God. :)

Gennean said...

Praying for you, friend. We're always in the best possible place we can be when we must fully trust in His faithfulness and sovereignty! Though it may seem like there's nothing on the horizon, God is working and orchestrating the most beautiful of stories just for you! Cling to Him, sister!

Sister Elle McCall said...

You want to know why my blog is called Faith Casts Out Fear?
Because it is a true thing that I have seen happen in my life.
The Lord told me I needed to serve a mission. And I was terrified.
And half the time I don't want to be here. But I know it's where He wants me. And I'm acting in Faith by being here.
It'll come honey. Keep praying and you'll find your calling :)

Just me said...

He knows we can't make it to much longer before the money runs out.

He also has an amazing way of providing just when you think it's the "last minute". God has amazing plans for you!

Bethany G said...

This is awesome! So blessed to know such a faithful servant of the Lord. He will reward your unfailing faithfulness!

Harriet said...

Praying for you here Jennifer, what courage to take that step but also to share it with us all here. Thank you.
He is faithful and his promises are held forever, He will honour your faithfulness and determination to follow Him. Love and support being sent across the oceans also.

Bon Bon said...

Will definitely be praying for you, sweet girl! Those steps of faith are always scary and exciting and every kind of emotion under the sun:-) I'm excited to watch the adventure unfold! xoxo

Stephanie said...

My mom just told me a story that she heard from her pastor about a guy who what the VP of a huge corporation. He felt the Lord calling him to ministry and finally called the corporate office and quit. They told him that they were about to give him a huge raise and make him the company president, but he quit anyway, and has never been happier. He's now been in ministry for 15 years and says it's the best decision he's ever made.

Jamie said...

CLING, girl, CLING!! You have the right idea! It might be awhile before you see God's plan, but He definitely has something for you!

Alexis Kaye said...

I so look up to your faith! :) I love that scripture in Proverbs!

Ashlee said...

I don't know why but this post brought tears to my eyes. I am getting ready to take the same step for the same reason. I think I know how it's going to pan out, and I think I know what the "new future" is going to be hold, but truthfully...I don't. I might fall flat on my face in a matter of weeks. But, I have been praying and listening and know in my heart that this is the right decision right now. Praying a little prayer for you and I today - that we will be guided down the right path and filled with confidence over doubt.

Jessica said...

I know the Lord will lead...keep trusting. and i love the support of your husband to let you go wherever God is calling. what a blessing.

Heather said...

Wow! That is faith in action. I was unemployed nearly two years before I found my current temp job. Even though things may be unclear God will always provide.

Abigail said...

wow. I will be praying for you on your new journey. The Lord will guide you and provide for you. some people just "talk the talk", but I can tell that you definitely "walk the walk." It's an encouragement to see other young people following in the Lord's light.
*Abby*

Kristen said...

Keep the faith! God's timing is so perfect, and I'm sure you'll be blown away by what He has in store for you! :-)

Lindsey N. said...

I greatly admire your faith. I can't imagine the kind of courage is must have taken to quit your job. Thank you for writing this.

The Bombshell Manifesto

m. said...

I was in the same boat around Christmas and it WAS scary, but God provided something so much better than anything I could have ever imagined... continue to hold on and to have "the faith of a mustard seed" - He is absolutely going to honor your obedience and lead you to something amazing =)

m. said...

I was in the same boat around Christmas and it WAS scary, but God provided something so much better than anything I could have ever imagined... continue to hold on and to have "the faith of a mustard seed" - He is absolutely going to honor your obedience and lead you to something amazing =)

m. said...

I was in the same boat around Christmas and it WAS scary, but God provided something so much better than anything I could have ever imagined... continue to hold on and to have "the faith of a mustard seed" - He is absolutely going to honor your obedience and lead you to something amazing =)

chelsea {joy} said...

oh, girl. such true words. i will definitely be praying for direction. ok, so this may end up turning into rambling, but i just came to your blog and was looking around and i saw the word jobless at the bottom of your post before i read it. all that stood out to be was the word bless. i thought you might have made a typo with the jo in front of it. i read the post and then got to the last sentence and saw that and was like oh.my.goodness. it says job less. and then it hit me, God is watching over you. He IS going to bless you. just be patient. i can't wait to see how He moves! xoxo!

Rhoda said...

You are on the road less traveled. But it is worth it. You will grow closer to God as you embark on this journey.

3 yrs ago my husband and I felt the tug to quit our ministry jobs and move from Illinois to Texas...right when the job situation in America was going downhill. We had no jobs to go to in Texas! Within 2 weeks my husband got a job (which has been his dream job!)

I didn't get a job right away. I wrestled with it and with what God was doing in my life, but He has now blessed me with a teaching job (so much more back story that goes with that). But in the midst of waiting...man, I drew close to Him and really knew Him!

Just like your verse says on the right side of your blog... "The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps."

I'm praying for you! Jobless = wet clay for God to mold!!! Can't wait to see how things unfold! If I were near you I'd give you a hug, and lay hands on you and pray! But for now I'll just pray :)

Karrie said...

It will come. Whatever that calling is, it will come. I believe God's biggest tests of us humans who sin faithfully (GRR!) is teaching us patience.
Prayer you find peace not fear!

Laura Elizabeth said...

Jen, please keep following in His path, please, please, please! It is so easy to get afraid and to stray from His ways and think that it is too hard. Please stay strong in this decision that you feel He's leading you.

mary said...

It will all work out. I just know it. xox!

My Beautiful Life said...

Even though it may seem like a rough spot, enjoy this time off.

Think of it this way-you have more time to reflect, read, blog :), work on more products for your etsy shop to fill up that first page, sing,write songs, spend more time making yummy meals for Mr.Blair, working on your compassion cry, spend time with God, and keeping in touch with family and friends...and the list goes on.

Don't just focus on being jobless. Focus on all the great things you have this time to work on. On one of S's cd's that was playing in the car this morning, the song lines that stuck out (it's a kids song) " well done good and faithful servant: you have been faithful with the few things, I will put you in charge of many things."

You are took that step of faith that we know pleases Him, and then realized you can't see the next step. Don't worry, it will appear.

Big hug to you,

-MBL

Amylou said...

Oh girl! I've been there. It can be a bit stressful!
I know God's got something special for you! Don't loose faith!

the Poston's said...

i know i'm a little late on this...but oh friend, i've been there... Left my job, and had no where to go. I had no idea what God had in store for me, but OH IS HE FAITHFUL. I couldn't have even have fathomed the dream job he had for me after that. Seriously. And then he took that job away 2 years later, and oh so purposefully. So His direction his good; and don't forget it will always be adventurous.

the Poston's said...

i know i'm a little late on this...but oh friend, i've been there... Left my job, and had no where to go. I had no idea what God had in store for me, but OH IS HE FAITHFUL. I couldn't have even have fathomed the dream job he had for me after that. Seriously. And then he took that job away 2 years later, and oh so purposefully. So His direction his good; and don't forget it will always be adventurous.

the Poston's said...

i know i'm a little late on this... but oh friend, i have been there. I have left a job into the unknown... and i had no clue what God had waiting for me. seriously. One thing you can always count on, is that He is so adventurous and oh so faithful :) Where he is brought me in the 5 years since is unreal.

girl willow said...

Found your blog through The Wiegands. I can totally relate to your post...we are in a similar position ourselves right now. But He is oh.so.good and I know that His promises are true and real!!

april@gingerbread said...

you are awesome.....for reals.
xoxo

Simple Life Journey said...

Uncomfortable. I know the feeling. A time of wait. A time of trusting. It is a frustrating time. But through it I have found, that it is in this time when I draw closest to the Lord. And then when I do come out of the wilderness, I miss it. I miss Him. It is a special time for you with Him. His plan is always so much more amazing than we can imagine. Just wait and see. :)

Alyssa Rae said...

what a step of faith my dear! May your heart stay open and your heart hear the Lords leading

Jennifer said...

Thank you all so much for the encouraging words! They truly are a blessing at this time in life!

Ashley said...

i LOVE your blog. i love coming across blogs of other believers who really are walking in faith. I pray for clarity, grace, and favor to fill every one of your days as He reveals His plan for you. Your obedience and faith will be blessed my friend :)
Glad to be a new follower on here and on twitter!

XOXO
Ashley
http://laluceimagery.blogspot.com
@AMarieWilson

Diane said...

It will be exciting to see what He provides for you. His way's are best.... His plans are far above ours. :O)

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